There is ample debate in this country today regarding government. There is discussion of scope, of role, and of purpose. There are unfortunately a slew of examples in which government of all shapes and sizes has failed undeniably. That indicts institutions and leaders. But, it should never change the way we feel about those who serve the leaders, follow their orders, suffer their failures. The Vietnam conflict taught us that dramatically, as did the traitors who posed on enemy weapons and seditionists that spat on the returning troops, and worse.
I was reminded recently of the tremendous service and sacrifice of so many. They have volunteered in droves since the last cessation of the military draft in 1973. This year we celebrate 50 years without compulsory military service. Since then, in various uniforms, the volunteers serve in places exotic to mundane, from our own fruited plains to various foreign shores. We pause or strive to, each November in recognition of those who have served. Veterans Day is disappointingly ignored by too many, and too easily overlooked.
Each May we pause in a more narrow context. Our focus for Memorial Day is directed to those who made the ultimate sacrifice. In grade school, we were taught about the Civil War and the many who laid down life and limb. Following that cataclysm, it became a tradition to emerge from each winter with the tradition of remembrance. Grave markers and cemeteries were rejuvenated in semblance. They were "decorated" and we came to the tradition of Decoration Day each May. In the North and South, so many struggled with the loss of spouses, siblings, and children, at the hands of ourselves, of each other.
It was once famously said that “all gave some, some gave all." The attribution of that has been to a Korean War veteran, Howard William Osterkamp. In the world of words, his six are very powerful.
Veterans surround us. Many have endured sacrifices and tribulations. A few have served in comfort and safety, well away from the risks and challenges. But, they too have served. Theirs is Veteran's Day. We thank them for their service. Though few businesses recognize that holiday and too few of us pause to even utter thanks. That is sad. May is different. That is not where we focus in May.
May recognizes the fallen. Statista says we have 1.3 million to mourn. Half of those from the Civil War alone. Those figures are apparently not exact; there are some that appear to be estimations. But, the figures are nonetheless staggering. We might do well to remember the astronomical loss that ensued between us here when temper flared, compromise faltered, and discourse failed.
I recently attended an interment of a veteran. It occurred to me that it is likely lost on many that various trials and tribulations endured in the service of our nation, fall on those who serve, but also on those that love them.
A conversation there recounted the familial frustration with military life and a particular duty station. It was recounted that this service member's spouse literally counted down day-by-day to the predicted end of that assignment, and escape from that location. The family does not volunteer, but they follow and endure nonetheless.
It reminded me that we have no day that memorializes the sacrifice and contribution of those who love the ones who serve(d). This is more disturbing still in the scope of Memorial Day. This day recognizes those who gave all, and far too impassively fails to acknowledge those they left behind. It is impractical to communicate with those who gave all. And yet, there are many that loved them; they linger in our presence.
Perhaps on this three-day weekend, we might acknowledge them also? This celebration certainly marks the start of summer. It is laden with merchandise, sales, cookouts, and more. But, it is bigger than that. And it is more than decoration. I am not sure when it began to morph into Memorial Day, but that evolution occurred. When Congress acted to shift various holidays to a persistent Monday observance, it codified "Memorial Day" in 1968. It is more than decoration, it is remembrance.
It is perhaps difficult to state a number like that above with any degree of certainty. There are conflicts that can be described and casualties that can be categorized. But these numbers likely understate the true volume.
In that moment of reflection this weekend, give a thought also to those who survived conflict and returned. Acknowledgment of those that returned seems more like Veteran's Day, but think about them anyway. Undoubtedly, a significant volume of survivors returned to find disillusionment, disappointment, disconnect, pain, and worse. They carried wounds, exposures, and burdens, which we are blessed to not comprehend. They returned, but their service killed them nonetheless. Their certificates don't reflect it. But the truth is out there for all to see.
In 2004, the National Park Service added a plaque to the Vietnam War Wall memorial. It reads simply
IN MEMORYOF THE MEN AND WOMEN
WHO SERVED IN THE VIETNAM WAR
AND LATER DIED AS A RESULT
OF THEIR SERVICE
The park service explains "Since the Vietnam War ended, thousands of Vietnam veterans have died each year due to Agent Orange exposure, PTSD/suicide, cancer and other causes related to their service." Those who served in Vietnam are not alone in that they returned with burdens, challenges, and more.
People are largely enamored with "the wall" now. There are replicas in places like Pensacola (park pictured above) and Wildwood, New Jersey. There are traveling replicas that appear in city after city throughout the year. But I remember when the wall was criticized, the designer ridiculed. There were those who protested construction of that monument forty years ago. They were wrong. There is value in remembering. There is beauty in simplicity. There is catharsis in community.
Inumerable veterans have died here from the scars and exposures of their experiences elsewhere. Despite coming home, some war killed them. Some quicker than others, but killed nonetheless. Many of those that returned were greeted with scorn, hatred, and vitriol by people who lacked the intellect to comprehend them. The protestor and dissident disagreement with their government morphed into disrespect for those who sacrifice, follow orders, and serve.
As we pause in May, let us reflect on the phenomenal volume of rights, privileges, and opportunities, which we enjoy in this country. Let us forget for a moment that there are inequities, inequalities, and happenstance. Fear not that your life has been inequitable and unfair. Everyone's has been. There is dysfunction, pain, and chaos everywhere, whether you see (admit) it or not. Don't fall into the trap of believing your neighbor's life is flawless, or even better than your own. You cannot know what opposition and burden they face, nor are you prescient to compare them to your own.
Let us focus on the fact that, despite our many challenges, failures, and disagreements, there is more freedom here than there has ever been in the world. There is the blessing of near-boundless opportunities at our fingertips. As we look around the world, acknowledge today's too numerous instances of war, famine, corruption, discrimination, slavery, pestilence, and worse. The world is a place where persecution and worse persist. Let us acknowledge that despite our imperfections, we are truly blessed.
Those blessings were preserved by those who gave some (recognize them in November) and by many who gave all. Whenever, wherever, whoever - all. Take a moment Monday to recognize how fortunate we each are, and say a prayer for the many that blessed us with the right to disagree so vehemently, sincerely, and completely with each other. And remember the families of the fallen as well as those who suffer burdens we do not see or comprehend.